Archive for the 'clips' Category


Sabre or Sabré?

So, I know I tend to go off in posts because I’m kind of passionate about issues I feel strongly about.

God, sometimes I feel like I should check myself but then I remember one of my professors. She told us that we should be more angry…in a way I think she was telling us not to be complacent and just take it. I can’t remember what country she was from but I know she was from S.America and she would tell us how when her people were upset they’d burn buses and trashcans out of anger…I’m not saying we should be destroying property but I do believe in what she meant…that we should be angry and that there is nothing wrong with being angry in regards to injustices, hypocrisy, exploitation, etc.

Anyway, I have so much to write about but I won’t do it all in this post. I’ll mainly focus on more positive things. One of my new resolutions for the new year is to minimize my carbon/global footprint which means not driving. I haven’t driven for over a month…although I do admit I drove on Saturday for about a 1 mile round trip but I think that is pretty good in my opinion. I’ve been taking the bus, riding my bike, and walking everywhere. According to Google maps (omg I can’t believe I used that website but it was linked to our local metro bus website) I don’t really save much on gas since our car is really gas efficient. But then I got to thinking….there were at least 10 people on the bus at the time which means 10 less cars on the road that decreases the amount of idle gas that is being spent during stop lights/signs….or just fuel inefficiency. So even if my car is good at saving gas there are lots of cars that aren’t…and still…10 less cars mean less traffic and less pollution. It’s sort of a pain to look up the times but the rewards are walking more (more exercise) and saving the world.

Although I really hate our local pedestrians…seriously, if there is a lot of traffic and lots of pedestrians I tend to let cars go by and then walk with the cars that are parallel to me to make it easier for drivers. But so many people just walk when they could wait a few seconds and don’t care about traffic. On top of that they walk so damn slow. I tend to power walk because I like to get places fast…which is why I carry handkerchiefs b/c I’m always sweaty. But anyway, I always walk quickly across crosswalks because I don’t think I’m above others and should demand that drivers wait for me to walk my slow ass across the street. But so many people walk so slow and talk like the world revolves around them. Seriously, I was mentally telling the bus driver to run them over.

Oh and that is another thing. I like swears. I know it’s not refined or lady-like but I love swears. Sure, in polite society I don’t swear but I think these words have a place in our society. Even if I made up a new one word it would eventually become ‘bad’. Like….douche….it used to only refer to feminine products but now has a new meaning…just like stupid,idiot, retard, moron…etc but they can have different contexts too. When I think of ‘stupid humans’ I’m thinking about people who are smart but don’t give a damn about the world…they don’t see beyond what is in their direct vision…they don’t consider the poor and suffering…but in most contexts it means someone of ‘limited’ intelligence…which is really questionable b/c what does intelligence really mean? Someone can be a harvard graduate and fuck over thousands of people through chemical exposure through their company and they’re seen as god-like. And yes…I didn’t capitalize harvard b/c they can all screw themselves and their elitist educational system.

Anyway, positive…positive. working on my business but it’s a slow process since I’ve been doing so much busing/walking/domestic stuff and home improvements. Seriously, I asked the guy at the hardware store how to remove the glued-on handle and track of my drawer and he tole me the best way was to use a razor to cut the glue, then sand the glue off and then properly install the hardware…fun..I’ve begun doing it but cutting through glue that is super old is not easy. I think those home improvement shows should hire me b/c I know so much at this point haha. But yes, still organizing my business and I’m excited.

Let’s see..we finally got our curtains and put them up. I actually used the drill! I wanted Nathan to use it but then I thought, “I should do it because I’m just as capable”. But, well I loaded the bit correctly but I hit a hard part and thought it was a pipe so I asked Nathan to finish it. He told me I did a good job but that I had hit a stud and not a pipe so I could have finished it myself if I hadn’t been so nervous. Well, I didn’t finish putting up the curtain rods but at least I know now what I did wrong…he pointed out the indications of pipes vs. wood but I still did it…sort of!

I painted the kitchen awhile ago and it is so awesome. Before we got the curtains our neighbors (how snoopy) all told us how the color looked great. I like to think of it as Mexican/S.Western/Salvadoran. I really like yellow 😀 Also, I’ll be posting my grandma making her awesome sweet potatoes and my crappy tofu frittata. I used silken tofu and followed the recipe but I think firm tofu would have been better.

Almost forgot, I made Pollo Asado with fake chicken strips which turned out ok but not as great as my Seitan Asado tacos…Also used my Mr. Bento for Nathan. Tortilla soup, Spanish rice, Beans, and condiments. Mr. Bento kept the food really warm and Nathan had a great lunch 🙂

Omg, I almost forgot the point of this post….Sabre vs. Sabré? So the second most recent episode of The Office had to do with the new company Sabre taking over. And the employees thought the company was pronounced Sabré. In reality, the company was called Saber…or Sabre by english terms. It was funny because I thought of it in the spanish sense and Nathan thought of it in the english sense. But we both didn’t mention it until a day later. I was joking to Nathan how stupid it was that the company was named Sabre when it should have been said as Sabré. He looked at me like I was an alien…Sabré? No it’s Sabre ( like Saber) and I said…’no it’s Sabré!!’ We were both laughing at the episode for totally different reasons. I interpreted it in the spanish sense and he understood it in the english sense. So we’re still arguing over which version is right…sabre or sabré.

I’ve stated before that I have issues with words for this reason. I don’t really know the rules to words…sometimes words seem more spanish to me so I pronounce them that way…other times I pronounce them in the english way. I still argue that Sabre shouldn’t be pronounced as ‘saber’ but Nathan disagrees haha. But the point is that cultures are integrating into our normative,white society so even t.v. programs discuss these issues. It’s amazing and great…at least IMO…(IMO=in my opinion)

Lastly, I’ll post pics of my grandma making her sweet potatoes, my grandpa playing his Wii, my vegan pie, and my awesome kitchen.

Love this song.

This song reminds me of MJ. We should all remember him.


We are the world, but the world is not them

I really hate celebrities. Fuck them. they have so much money and give ::oh:a:million:: oh so much. But it isn’t that much in comparison to what they have. I’ve seen so much in my life and that isn’t even enough. Nathan has seen things I haven’t seen. I’ve seen the dead, the poor, the hungry, the infected….more than that…I hate that Haiti is some shallow icon of goodness in regards to our money.  I wish…sometimes I wish…that I could forget the things I’ve seen. But I can’t. Fuck the new ‘We are the World’ b/c it’s meaningless. They all sing and cry and it’s still black and white. Still woman and man. No diversity. Where are the latinos, asians, native americans, the eastern europeans,  the people who are unspoken for? What about the animals and plants? What about all those people we don’t think of but are slaves to our consumption? What about M.J?

Sometimes I get tired…tired of fighting. We need to remember that people are suffering beyond natural disasters. Sweatshops, human trafficking, plain ignorance…etc We need to remember everyone. Not just one sad event…people die for no reason…drugs, earthquakes, floods, political reasons…etc. those people shouldn’t be forgotten.

I remember when I tried to raise money for hurricane mitch in H.S. I got at most 40US. No one cared. I wanted people to care b/c my family was hurting….and here we are…donating money to Haiti and two weeks later it’s barely a blip on our radar. The new ‘We are the World’ is so lame. All these people are doing it and yet most of these people don’t give money in general. Brangelina adopt a bunch of 3Wld children and donate but they don’t really help in comparison to their monetary gains.

What would Jesus do?

I’m not super religious. but I try to live by moral codes. I haven’t driven a car in over a month…I’ve been taking the bus or biking…I don’t want to justify myself. But why don’t people care? Why don’t people give a shit? I hate crying. but I do it so much b/c I don’t understand why people don’t care. Sometimes, I hate caring so much…I wish I could be a bad person so I wouldn’t feel anything. but I can’t…

I feel so much. So does Nathan. We are the world…but is the world us?  I don’t know anymore. All I know is that we want everyone to be in a safe place. but that won’t happen anytime soon.

Sometimes…it feels like my heart is bleeding…that is why I don’t like to talk to people.  I just don’t know what to do.

P.S. We are the world original link got taken down so I’m posting a new one. enjoy.


the reason why i don’t need human babies


Live long and prosper

Finished my first sock!

I’m so proud. Not as difficult as I had thought and really satisfying. I’ve ordered more yarn for my other sock pattern which should arrive friday AND my yarn from august is coming in on thursday! I doubt I’ll focus on the bigger project soon but I’m glad that I am actually getting the yarn. No news on Nathan’s Vegan shoes though 😦

Anyway, I started the second sock and have yet to weave in the ends of my first sock. I kind of don’t like that I didn’t use a kitchener stitch for the toe but oh well. It’s a bit looser than I would like in the ankle area but oh well…at least the new sock book I have has taught me how to adjust size a bit more so I’ll have to keep that book as a reference in the future.

Picture 428Picture 429Picture 431

I really hate weaving in the ends of items. Just so annoying to do after having spent time knitting the item and then having to do extra work. But I’ll save that task till the next sock.

In other news, I have made my vegan goat cheese but haven’t gotten around to making my tarts but I hope to post those soon.

My mother told me of this new show called ‘V’ which is a remake of the older series back before I was born…I think. For my mother, the reference to Firefly goes further because the leader of the Visitors is actually the high-class escort/prostitute/cultural equal which we thought was so awesome. I hate shows like these because of the scary music and I had to make Nathan hold my hand and I muffled my mouth with my hair because I was afraid I’d scream if it turned out scary. I’m a total sucker for scary music.

Which made me question why we don’t have more happy alien shows/movies…I could only think of ALF and 3rd Rock from the Sun. Personally, I don’t like scary movies or scary/drama movies/shows because I’m a huge wiener. Seriously, Nathan can turn around and say ‘boo’ (which he has) and I’ll scream. I’m just emotional and I’m not saying that because I have two XX that I must be emotional…I’m sure if I had a X and a Y I’d still be a weenie…I’d like to blame my parents for not toughening me up but maybe it just has to do with my personality. I actually sort of screamed at the laundry mat last week because the manager talked to me while I was turned and didn’t see him. I think he felt really bad about it but I reassured him that I’m just that lame.

Maybe it has to do with my Disney upbringing. I would get scared on the Snow White ride…still kind of dread it. I don’t know…I’m just one of those people who likes everything to be rainbows and happy carebear stars. Not saying I don’t like gritty films or dramas, but scary stuff just doesn’t make sense….I’m such a weenie.

Currently reading Mansfield Park and Closing the Food Gap, but I tend to read fiction faster than non-fiction…I think I like the imagery and imagining what it would be like to live in those times. It makes me think about the social/cultural roles of the sexes and how much money plays into the lives of us all. But it also makes me think about how the more influential people are historically the more corrupt, sad, and wrong many of these people were. It almost seems that being poor (or not wealthy) is a way to a more peaceful life in terms of being manipulated and corrupted. But I suppose the trade-off is being more exposed to hunger, poverty, disease, being put on the front of war time hostilities, and so on. I think I like Jane Austen because she wrote so much about marriage, social mobility (or the lack/downfall of mobility), and moral/individual education of women that it makes me ponder why our society works the way it does in present day. Especially since she nor her sister never married and I really can’t wait to visit England since I think the British Museum (if i remember correctly) has the only painting of her and her sister. Of course, my personal history has no/little links to European society but as a post-colonial/oppressed/erased legacy I find her works really interesting.

Anyway, I won’t get into some random post about this since I feel like I’m talking out of my ass half the time. But I like to think that this blog is a space for me to think out my thoughts even if I question what I wrote the next day.

I’ll end this post now. Take care and Eat good food.


My mother recently brought up how Gwen Stefani is totally into colonial exoticism which (not to brag 😛 hehe) I’ve noticed for some time. I remember the first CD that I actually bought (with a gift card but I picked it all the same) was a No Doubt CD. I can remember the place and time and thinking how great the band seemed on the radio and I used my card to buy it. But after so many years of watching her it’s both sad and fun because I must admit that I do like some of her songs…but this one I really hate because it just seems so exploitative but I’m sure some of her other ones are deeply offensive as well to certain people. I hate posting it since it seems like I’m promoting her while criticizing her but oh well.

I don’t want to go off but notice the Mexican foil candy, the Virgin de Guadalupe shirt torn in half to reveal her bikini top/breasts, her hair which is kind of latina, the nail salon scene, the fact that her Japanese girls are acting black/latina, the Pinatas, the Frida hair style, the entire outfit, god damn it’s so maddening. It goes beyond playing some part in a music video…at least to me…it seems wrong but whatever…just wanted to post it for reference.


I need a rain dance pls.

Why won’t it rain more?

I’m sick of it being gloomy and rainy and then sunny and way too warm for 4 days straight. Bah, I want my rain. But I can’t do much about it except wait for evening when the fog usually rolls in and it’s beautiful.

I’ve been doing a lot of knitting on my corn socks. Yes, corn yarn. It feels super soft although I’ve been warned never to iron them unless I went a hot, sticky, sugary mess….but I rarely iron my clothing unless it’s something that really gets wrinkly. I’m not sure if this book sort of sucks in terms of the editor or publisher because I know that one pattern has some serious issues and I even emailed the publishing house for the correct pattern and they totally copped out and sent me a link to a site that was basically a woman’s blog and she happened to notice some of the errors and made a corrected chart. Unfortunately, I didn’t want the chart since I had already been to that site but I wanted to check and see if there were more corrections. Bah, anyway, I’m not going to even bother with that pattern.

I’m really wondering if knitters have to play with patterns a lot or if this book just didn’t get as much attention to detail as it should have because this sock pattern is a wee bit off. And I’m totally following directions and rereading them, looking up the types of stitches to double check that I did learn the correct way to do it…and still it’s a bit off. It’s really the heel, the rib pattern wasn’t layering quite right so I adjusted it but the rib moved over a few stitches. I haven’t had difficulty with other patterns from online, magazine, or other book sources before so I’m really wondering if these designers had other people make them to make sure the patterns worked. Who knows but I really don’t want to give up on this book because it has some really interesting patterns and deals with a lot of interesting yarns instead of the regular animal fibers.

So, back to my point, my socks are coming out nicely and except for a minor flaw they look pretty good. I still have about 5 more rounds to do before I turn the heel and I’m pretty excited to be making socks for the first time. It sounds boring but if I want to start doing designs and such I need hands-on experience and besides…I love socks. I’m using Crystal Palace Yarns “Maizy” which has 18% elastic nylon which should be good for stretching and shaping….and I got it in Stormy Purple.

Picture 365

Small pic, and hard to see, but the cuff has 5 cables which was rather annoying and I’m glad to be done with them. I don’t mind cables but the yarn is quite fine and doing  about 12 of them in a row gets annoying. I’m not usually a fan of multi-colored yarn but I think for some projects it really makes them more interesting. I’ll try to keep updating my progress and hopefully I won’t do something wrong and have to unravel…

In between my knitting I have made some new food although the salad was pretty basic but oh so yummy. I’ve been really scared of trying heirloom tomatoes because they look like aliens and I’m still overcoming my fear of tomatoes. Sure I eat them all the time but certain things just scare me for some reason…fried green tomatoes? I feel like there are worms in there but I’m not sure if that was from the book that I read when I was younger or if I just made it up in my head…or sun dried tomatoes…my mom used to try and force me to eat them and I would literally gag…it was like my throat would close up and I was getting sucked down a tube and my life was fading from me and then…I would spit it onto the plate rather than sacrifice my life for a stupid, nasty tomato. So I have issues…but I told myself that I need to woman up and buy them before I regretted it. So here they are…my lovely tomatoes from the farmer’s market.

Picture 346Picture 347Picture 352

I really loved the peach looking tomato and it was rather sweet in comparison to the green one which was definitely tart and less juicy. The red one tasted a bit like a regular tomato but perhaps I haven’t developed my heirloom tomato palate. Peachy, since I didn’t look at their official names, had a beautiful marbled interior that was amazing to look at and I kept the slices large so that we could enjoy the colors as well and experience different tastes and sizes as they filled our mouth. I know, that sounds a bit pervy but I stick to my claim that most food is super sexy and we might as well enjoy it. Tried out a pretty basic recipe from one of my cook books but I only had sourdough in the fridge which made it look a bit less impressive than italian country bread that I think the recipe recommended. Basically toasted the bread in the oven and spooned the nut,garlic, olive oil mix onto it and let it toast for an extra minute. I probably didn’t need to let it toast more since the recipe used cheese which would have melted it but oh well. Totally great side dish to our dinner and I kept eating the left overs out of the bowl the rest of the night.

I’ve been really into hand mixing lately which I know is good for the food since we can better gauge, season, and handle the dish and plus it does give an organic feeling to cooking. I still use spoons to mix up the liquids initially since I don’t want my hand covered in dough but I really do love feeling doughs and foods in my hands. So, I hand mixed the seasonings and liquids of this salad especially since I didn’t want to break any of my Maters. It’s kind of silly how basic this recipe is and Nathan thought it tasted a lot like Bruschetta which it did after he said it. So basically I made a larger version of it and I can’t believe I fell for that cook’s recipe! He should have named it ‘Fancy Bruschetta’ but I’m not really all that mad but it does feel weird when we think certain foods are new and exciting and then we realize that we’ve had similar dishes before and it’s not as exotic as it initially seemed.  But maybe that’s the anthropology background I grew up around…always exotizing cultures and people…but now I’ve shifted it over to food. Omg, I’m a horrible person…

So let’s shift gears because I don’t want to dwell on my new discovery. I made some more turnovers which came out better than the originals but I still have a bit of a hard time getting them to seal. I let it defrost in the fridge for about 4 hours and made the filling…peeled two ripe pears, mixed in some cornstarch, turbinado sugar, cinnamon, and a dash of nutmeg. Hand mixed again since the pears were really ripe and I thought that a spoon would break them apart.

Picture 359Picture 360Picture 361Picture 364

I actually remembered to sugar the tops before I baked them! I’m proud of myself for that since they came out a bit salty since the vegan butter I have access to has salt mixed in so I can’t control that aspect of the dough. I did omit the salt that was in the recipe but it still was a bit salty since I had forgotten to add sugar to the tops and it really did offset the salt. I’m thinking of buying another measuring tape since I use this one for baking all the time. I’m really bad with measurements…I always think an inch is way smaller which is why I keep my soft measuring tape near me when I knit because I have no concept of length. I’m still having trouble with the seal and I used rice milk which didn’t seem all that great. I usually use flax seed but I ran out and I keep forgetting to buy more so I’ll have to try that next time. Another issue which I’m sure is probably partially my fault are the layers…the foto isn’t as great but when they came out of the oven I could really see the layers but I still feel like I could have gotten more puffiness and flakiness. I may not be an official pastry student but I’ve read a lot of different sources, looked at tutorials, and watched a lot of videos on how to prepare the dough all the way to baking it…so I feel like I have a rather good grasp as to handling the dough and I chilled it a lot between the steps because it was getting a bit warm that day. Anyway, my point is that I wonder if animal fats/veggie shortening work differently than vegan butter in the mechanics of dough. Maybe I’m just expecting a ton of puffiness from my first puff pastry dough and that probably isn’t realistic. They tasted great and I would say that about half of them sealed up and the over half burst open the second I put them on the baking stone…but it was really amazing to see them puff up rather quickly. I could have over filled them too since I’m fairly new to pastries but over all it was really satisfying

To sum up the last two paragraphs…Lots of work, I’m a noob so the pastries probably didn’t come out as well but I decided to blame everything else since theoretically I knew what I was doing. Haha, now I need to make more to prove that I can make fantastic looking pastries.

Let’s see, I wonder if I have any new rants to go on about. Well, Santa Cruz has officially banned smoking downtown, west cliff, and by our area which really makes my blood boil. We’re seriously going to fine people who smoke to generate income for the county which is the 4th most expensive place to live in the U.S. When we went to Monterey I noticed they had ashtrays attached to the trash cans which was really great because people don’t have to litter. But Santa Cruz has the brilliant idea of not putting many recycling bins downtown and no ashtrays and then they decide to bitch about cleaning up. When we went up to Natural bridges the roads were all being repaved but they weren’t even horrible to begin with but lower downtown, beach hill, beach flats, and numerous other parts of SC are in major need of repair but they decide to repave the roads where there are million dollar houses. And it’s conflicting to me because I rant and rave about this but I don’t feel like I have much of a right to say anything because I don’t consider myself a local and I don’t intend on living in this city for the rest of my life. I suppose I feel like it’s appropriation if I start looking for ways to improve the city since it’s not my city.

SC has major housing, homeless, and general city issues but they never focus on these problems but instead decide to pull stupid bans that only serve to bring in money. Everyone likes to think of SC as so liberal and it is in some ways…culturally I suppose, but I feel like our civil liberties are being violated when things like this happen. They argue that it’s better for children…well I think walking by a person smoking for 30 sec is going to do a lot less damage than the fact that we’ve taken P.E. out of many schools, many children (and adults) are eating hormone-pumped, genetically modified, trans-fat, etc food, are inhaling exhaust/smog and I could probably think of a million more things.

Really, drinking coffee is probably worse than that…and to be honest I don’t think smoking downtown is that big of a problem…maybe one person for every two blocks? And seriously, how many drug deals go on that aren’t dealt with and I think that is more dangerous than this new ban.

I really hate what the U.S. is becoming…or is. And I know, before anyone posts, that we’ve been eating genetically modified foods for a long time…like corn…but that also took a lot longer and the way First world countries have forced the world to obliterate so many strains of food is horrible and dangerous when a new pest or disease worms it way into our perfect, bland food.

I really want to move away from this country but it’s going to take a lot of work and even then I know it’s not a solution and I remember criticizing my peers for wanting to do the same thing. But in a way I think I justify my desire because both Nathan and I come from families of immigrants and in a lot of ways we had very migratory lives. When people ask where I’m from I honestly don’t know what to say…I usually say ‘down south’ since it’s somewhat true but what is my hometown? I don’t know…is it where I was born but didn’t live? or The place I was at longest…well technically I suppose SC is the longest but I divide my time here by my mental well being…the first few years were really hard and I didn’t venture out or even really realize my surroundings.

And if I move I know there is that criticism of wanting to move to a European country…as if I’m falling into that colonial state of mind in that I want to become like them and be the white colonial power. But I think it’s wrong to think in that old frame of mind because we’re neglecting to see the millions of post-colonial subjects that live in the EU and who have voices and communities and are very much trying to claim their right to be there. And to be honest, certain countries seem easier to move to…like not learning another language is a plus but this is still a dream of mine that I’m attempting to research so as to make it a reality. But it’s problematic because I know there are conflicts wherever I go but perhaps I want to choose which fights I can join instead of feeling tired of having to justify why I don’t want a huge house or why want to part of the traditional working sector.

I think I realize as I grow older how hard it is for people who have moved a lot to claim an identity. If I move to another country I’ll finally have a more solid identity…as a foreigner…an ex-pat, and American. And I’m not saying I want to become some huge nationalist to a new country and go on about how much better it is than the U.S. (although I think most countries have many and different aspects that are better) or that the U.S. is a horrible place but instead I just would like to live somewhere else. If someone moves cities it’s not a big political deal but saying I don’t want to live in the country has so many ramifications on both the nationalist and post-colonial sides. I’m screwed either way. I also don’t want to erase my history or identity but sometimes I feel like I can’t relate to most people because I’ve had such a mixed history. I had to learn how people acted in different parts of the state and then in C.A. and to adjust to that and then to figure out my own cultural identity which is at times insane. I’m not latina enough and I’m not white enough which is fine but I don’t want to justify myself by knowing big fancy spanish words.

I remember when I was at a conference in Honduras and it was discussion on Women’s rights and many of the ‘liberal/intellectual’ women were using very academic language that I couldn’t understand but of course I knew my spanish wasn’t as great as a native speaker. And yet at one point some women interrupted and they said they couldn’t understand and basically accusing them of patronizing them (or perhaps matronizing?) with these huge terms because they were indigenous and relatively poor in comparison yet they still wanted to organize. I felt really good after that because I may not have great skills but it’s very much apart of me and even though I do want to learn more I still know more than most people think. I have dreams in spanish and I think about my experiences all the time and that won’t ever change. But at the same time I have to recognize that I can’t really share the same experiences with other Salvadorans/Latino(a)s/Indigenous people because many of them have a collective memory or experience. Many lived in poor areas, or at least in the same community where they faced racisim together or perhaps had to leave their home country because of war but I feel like there is always something that binds them even if they still have their individual differences. And I know collective organizations/communities are problematic because one way or another select ideas/agendas/experiences get promoted over others so I know just because someone grew up in South Central L.A. doesn’t mean they feel connected to their community for that sole geographic/cultural reason but I think most times it does.

So where does that leave people like me or that minority of minorities that doesn’t feel connected? I don’t think it’s wrong to want to live a life that a person chooses, especially if we keep thinking about why we make those sorts of choices. I like to believe that I think more about what I do and don’t do than many of the world’s citizens but again…I’m privileged enough to get to questions and make choices and for that I’m grateful but it doesn’t mean that I owe this country my loyalty when it’s oppressed, murdered, enslaved, and generally stomped on my ancestors and others without a second thought. Where was the reflection and questioning of our governments? It still continues with us blindly agreeing that going to Iraq was important because somehow the attacks of 9/11 were directly linked to Iraq…

It’s really hard writing and hoping that people can read through my sarcasm, my exaggerations, my moods, and my political bull. Half the time I write without realizing that people will indeed read this but I try to be careful not to turn this into some sort of diary. I’ve never been very good at diaries actually so maybe this blog is really lame and meaningless. But I suppose in the grand scheme of things our lives are pretty mundane when we think of the plants and stars and the evolution of life…I think I’m becoming too self-reflective. I think being a libra amplifies this tendency because I try to be fair even though I’m far from it.

Anyway, I’ll sign off before I start questioning why I’m not going to continue to write. I’m posting this show that is super funny that I found on netflix and I can’t wait for the 4th season. The IT Crowd…just a clip but super funny. Just for context…Jen gets a bit of an ego after getting ’employee of the month’ and she doesn’t really know anything about computers…

Update: Embedding disabled but hopefully those who want to view it can still be viewed by clicking through to Youtube. Sorry ’bout that >.<


Pie? Mmmmm

Yay for summer time.

Lots of things have been happening in the world that have been really horrible, tragic, and concerning. But I try to remember that there is lots of suffering going on even when it’s not headlines. I’ve been really bothered by so many stories of wrongful or misunderstood imprisonments and I hope that by thinking of them that their stories and lives will be remembered and fought for even though they remain in horrible, unjust conditions. I heard recently of a blogger who might have taken his life after spending some time in prison and another from Yemen who did the same. It worries me that Americans often don’t question our own government in the treatment of prisoners, both foreign and domestic, since we often fall prey to patriotic propaganda and the likes. The notion that the government is infallible and always has our best interest at heart seems a bit naive on our part. I think I’m pretty cynical but I also hope that through my critical eye that we question everything around us for the sake of compassion and understanding of those who become muted and/or erased by our government. But it’s not just the U.S., I should admit that much, but many other countries, political groups, gangs, etc that forget their humanity in the struggle for power and dominance.

It’s also so weird that I’ve been thinking about this and yet I have a bit more respect for our local police that helped us out yesterday. We’ve been taking our walks for a few weeks now since we got our cool little nikes that don’t cripple our feet like our old ones did. Yesterday was a bit of a random day since I had some things to do so we didn’t start our walk until 7pm which is rather late for us but it’s been so light and warm out we still were able to exercise. We reached the top of the hill and were getting ready to cross the street when we noticed a man attempting to break into Nathan’s car. >.<  I was about to flip out at the guy but we calmly walked over and then of course Nathan laid into the guy….He had managed to pop out part of the back window and was trying to get it to go down when we found him but thankfully we got the window back in easily.

This guy starts giving us some bullshit about how it’s his friend’s car and how he lives at No.4 and he knows our manager Carlos….We totally laughed in hindsight….why would you break into a friend’s car in the first place? The guy who lives at No.4 is not named Steve….and our Manager isn’t named Carlos. The sad part is that he could have found out the manager’s name if he looked at the ‘For Rent sign…call J-‘. I just couldn’t believe the nerve of this guy especially since the only thing of value in Nathan’s car is an empty soda can. But this has actually happened numerous times…he’s actually gotten his license plates stolen and we got tickets because the DMV wasn’t open on the weekend when it happened. I had to buy a new drill kit because they stole his out of his trunk because he didn’t think anyone would break into his car….the list goes on. Granted he’s getting rid of his car because of major electrical problems but it’s still the principle.

And I’m totally for being a Narc being that we have to deal with this kind of stuff all the time. We even saw a couple walk by the guy and they didn’t even say anything…personally I would have called the cops if I witnessed a break in even if it turned out to be the owner who locked in his keys I still would want to make sure it wasn’t a break in. Especially in our neighborhood. It’s not even a bad neighborhood but we get so many transients and people who are just ‘scumbags’ to quote my neighbor. Seriously, we have an elderly home on our street and a lot of nice people but Santa Cruz just attracts a lot of people in our area…haha but I suppose it makes life a bit interesting as opposed to living on the Westside where everyone is loaded and kind of assholes to regular folks. Anyway, so we called the cops and tried to tail the guy but he turned into one of the apt. complexes near us and we’re pretty sure he just jumped a bunch of fences since the two streets that he would have taken are really long so it’s great visibility. The cops showed up really quickly and to be honest the female cop was kind of a bitch and looked at me funny…maybe my purple running shorts were seen as a fashion crime in her eyes. But the male officer was really nice and was joking around with us and every understanding. We got to watch him dust for fingerprints and I even helped out since his roll of tape was hard to peel and since I have long fingernails I can now say I partook in civic duty. I doubt they’ll catch the guy but if the fingerprints come up and he tries it again maybe it will help their case. It’s really odd because a lot of the cops can be jerks around here but I’ve also seen and heard from friends about really nice ones so I guess it’s like any profession…although I do think certain counties have a higher proportion of jerky cops but maybe I’m just biased. We actually had a friend who got fined for spitting which I thought was really over the top because I’ve grown up knowing, hearing, and seeing guys spit because they feel the need (even though personally I think it’s all in their heads because I’ve known way too many guys who don’t spit regularly). But he actually won his case but that is just a random story that I thought I should write….

Anyway, that was exciting….

In other news, Nathan finally hooked up my new monitor (from christmas) and installed his wireless mouse (also from christmas)…we’re not usually that lame about things but I knew Nathan would feel sad about not having a big screen even though he’s using my old screen which was bigger than his old one. Little puppy dog eyes totally get to me so I’m sure we’ll be getting him one also since we’re totally spoiled only-children. But I think we’re a bit unique because we’re not the kind of spoiled kids that want a bunch of stuff and need a bunch of attention but we definitely get jealous if one of us gets a shiny new toy. I’m still jealous of his iphone even though I like my little phone and I can’t ever work his touchscreen anyway…but now that they lowered the prices on them we might both get upgrades since he thinks his ‘old’ phone is too slow since it’s one of the OG iphones (original gangster). But the point is that we’re shiny addicts…we love new shiny boxes, shiny new books, dvds, it’s just so magical because it’s like christmas for us every time we buy something.

So I’ll have to take a picture of my new monitor but I’ve been kind of pathetic with taking pictures lately….too much work, I think. But I have taken some which I’ll present now…woohoo

Picture 169Picture 172

My awesome blueberry pie! Well, it tasted great and looked pretty good from the top but the recipe told me to make a mound in the center but I think I made it a bit big by the looks of the photo but it was my first one. I’ve waited an entire year for fresh summery blueberriers and $20US later I was stocked up with them and making my pie. Blueberries aren’t the cheapest berries for a pie but it was super good and they’re full of great things like anti-oxidants. Mmmm. Personally, I was thinking about going with the ‘joy of baking’ recipe but Martha is pretty consistent so I tried hers out. I think there wasn’t enough of something because the berries didn’t meld as much as I thought they would  and I’m think I should have mashed more of the berries than the recipe called for. Still yummy and maybe in a week or so I’ll make it again.

The only other picture is my celtic cable scarf which was taken two weeks ago ( I think) and it’s longer now but still going slowly since it’s hard to find time between the cooking and cleaning and the bike riding.

Picture 181Picture 182

The flash kind of washed out the cables since the shadows show the depth and interweaving more but every time I tried it with no flash it was blurry. It must have been me or something because I’ve taken the flash off before and it was fine. Anyway, it’s more a magenta then a pepto pink…not sure if it looks girly but I like bright colors. It was kind of nice because I went to the bookstore and picked up a knitting magazine and the checkout woman was asking me what I was working on and talking to me about knitting. Sometimes I feel like I’m projecting some 1950s image but when I meet people who like similar things or understand my work it’s both relieving and wonderful to connect with someone.

I didn’t start this scarf as a celtic cable scarf since a. I thought it might be a little euro-centric of me and b. everyone loves those cables. But after a few failed attempts at the triple twist cable I figured I ought to switch for my sanity. To be honest, I’ve been a bit conflicted about my cooking and knitting b/c I spend so much time cooking that I don’t get as much knitting in as I’d like. I’ve been thinking of toning down my cooking menus but I feel bored if I eat a meal twice in one week, excluding salads. I think I’m still in awe of vegan cooking and discovering all I can do. I’ve always loved working with my hands and touching things so cooking is so fascinating and there is so much to learn from vegan cooking in terms of binding agents, leavening agents, and substituting the right thing in regard to flavor. So maybe I’ll eventually get into more of a cooking pattern so I can delve into knitting more. I have so much to learn and since it’s all self taught I have many disasters and frustrations but so much more enjoyment. Plus I think it’s a bit easier to sell knit items than cooking stuff unless I make a cookbook. At this point I’m trying to focus on gaining more skill, making some presents, and hopefully being able to turn out some easy, warm, and functional items for the winter for the charity organizations. I actually saw last week that an immigrant workers union is looking for warm clothing, blankets, and food items for their clients (not sure if that is the correct term) so I’m really hoping to make some items for them as well. Plus the vet we go to is always asking for blankets for their animals since they are in partnership with some adoption agencies so I think about doing something for them too.

I guess I just want to help others while at the same time I want to earn money off of my future talent. I’m still learning so much though that I can’t really expect to make patterns and items until I invest more time and money into knitting but I still think about these things. I remember one time in one of my anthro classes that this one student was complaining that these elderly women were knitting items for the organization she worked for that helped women and children in africa that were suffering from issues such as disease, aids/hiv, lack of food, etc. And she was saying that instead of knitting these blankets that they should have been donating money because their items were impractical. Even though I hadn’t picked up knitting at that point, I was still upset because people still need those sorts of items and if the issue was that the yarn was too heavy for the climate then why didn’t they approach the knitters about making more light weight items…or making knit diapers (which I’ve seen some really crazy, time consuming ones) or even knit mosquito nets? I suppose I was upset by the ungrateful attitude of the student who obviously didn’t know how much time goes into those items and they obviously picked that organization to help. They could have sent those items to E. Europe, or Asia, or the colder regions of the Americas. I guess it upset me that she was looking a gift horse in the mouth….I think that is the phrase…if not I’ll come back and correct it. haha.

In light of all that has been happening in California, I think they should nominate me as the new Miss California because I do want world peace and I want to help out even though I don’t make six figures and I don’t think money is always the answer. How many times have governments and corrupt groups taken aid and money and never helped those who were starving and dying? We donate to our local radio station a few times a year, give tips,  and try to lessen our impact on the world and yet so many others only care about if they have the newest Tiffany’s bracelet or fancy new car. None of which are bad (although I would still argue about blind consumerism) but I think we need to pull together as a people, nation, and world and help each other out. I think most religions would agree. And I’m not even trying to be a saint because I love bottled water, I love my new nikes, I love being wealthy enough to buy organic and fair trade, and I love being a first world citizen…I even ::gasp:: consume dairy once a week which goes against our veganism. I suppose I’m just sick of people saying they’re too strapped to give back or are too busy….what about volunteering? or what about not maxing out their credit because our society practically forces us to consume excessively. Ugh…I’ll stop this rant. I think Disney corrupted me with ‘It’s a Small World’ ride. Even though we don’t go to church and we’re not really religious I think we’re good followers of Jeezy Creezy. Every time I wear my Nino de Atocha or St. Francis de Assisi necklace I go into the world thinking about those groups that they help. Maybe it’s silly and superstitious but deep down I pray that they will help the prisoners, travelers, or lost animals and guide them to a path that leads to their safety…haha maybe I am a bit more of a Catholic than I think I am.

Anyway, I need to post more because I tend not to rant as much but I’m pretty sure only my family reads this ::waves:: I think I’m safe.

I’m going to end with a great video link of a World of Warcraft movie that players love and many people make great movies but this group is one of my favorites.Until next time….eat good food and be happy.


Goodbye to my wisdom….teeth

Well I am finally back to my less stressful life.

I’ve been freaking out for a week about ‘going under’ while getting my teeth extracted. It just scared me to think about being totally unaware of what was happening to my body and then there was that whole Seinfield episode where he thinks his dentist is kind of pervy and may have violated him while under nitrous…I think I worry too much.

So yes, I’ve been really nervous but they gave me some meds before the appt. to probably calm down people like me. I felt like I was getting some plastic surgery though. Was all covered up, they placed a bandage over my hairline to keep from getting in the way, I was plugged into a heart monitor (EKG I think), had some nerdy glasses put on, and had my blood pressure taken so often. I wonder if the blood pressure machine helped speed up the drugs since they gave it to me through and I.V. Oh, and they stuck tubes in my nose for oxygen which was probably a bit of a relaxer too. But I must be a totally nut because all this stuff made me so nervous and listening to my heart beat made it worse.

But I sort of drifted off but was still awake which was nice. I could actually feel them take out the teeth…a bit unpleasent but I’m glad I was somewhat awake for that. I can’t believe how quickly it was done and I can feel that they are gone. I feel kind of bad…maybe I should have asked them for my teeth because I didn’t even have a goodbye talk with them. 😦

Well, I was super drugged and I felt really funny…I had this silly notion that I would come back, rest a bit, and then go for our walk. Of course I conked out for hours only to wake up and load up on more drugs and antibiotics. But Nathan was great and made me a whole pot of soup while I was asleep and it made me feel so good. 

Weirdly enough I’m not in any pain so far today although eating banana bread with walnuts wasn’t as wise a choice on my part. Hopefully I won’t have to take any more of the vicodin since it sort of makes me funny and clouds my head. I probably wouldn’t mind being a bit funny but I hate feeling like I lack my normal amount of clarity (which isn’t much to begin with). So hopefully it will just be my antibiotics and some advil for the next few days.

April 2019
« Nov